09/14/20 DLG FB NOTE... SOCIAL MEDIA, AN ALTERNATIVE REALITY??? 07/21/12

09/14/20 DLG FB NOTE... SOCIAL MEDIA, AN ALTERNATIVE REALITY??? 07/21/12

CHRISTIAN CONSISTENCY

I have been thinking about something for a while. How does the internet, social media in particular, affect your relationships with other people, your Christian witness and your walk with God? There is no alternative reality for a Christian, even in the social media world.

DECEIVED

Some people see social media as a special reality. In other words, they will say things online that they would not say in another situation. They become familiar, comfortable, associated with things online that they would not be involved with in another situation.

An extreme example is a person who normally has nothing to do with pornography, or crude, racy and racial conversation, but online or in a chat situation, they give in to lower standards and to social pressure.

Sometimes people cut legitimate lines of authority, accountability and association when involved in a social media setting. People become involved in online conversations that they would never have in a person to person setting, because such conversations might have a negative impact on someone or because such conversations might elicit a negative response from another person.

HANDS OFF, WHEN POSSIBLE

Unless it is a clear violation of Biblical principles, I try not to jump too quickly in dealing with a new or different situation, because a "canned" response or an "old cloth" answer may not be appropriate. I try to wait on the Holy Spirit when I am entering new social territory. As a seasoned follower of Christ I have a foundation of Biblical ethics and I tend to trust that other believers will also be wise and sensitive in their online encounters as well. BUT IT DOES NOT ALWAYS TURN OUT THAT WAY.

NO ALTERNATIVE PRESENCE

I am a Christ follower, a husband, a father, a grandfather and a pastor. This is not just what I do, this is what I am. Being a Christ follower determines my moral presence online. Being a husband, father, grandfather and pastor also plays into my interpersonal presence online.

MUTUALLY RESPONSIBLE

As a father of grown children, I have made it my business to not interfere or interject myself into their private lives. Likewise, I do not look for the nits in my grandchildren's relationships, words or actions, or ride herd on my parishioners. It is not my place, it is not my calling, it is not my desire. I have friends in the real world as well as online that do things, say things that are offensive to me, but we are not part of the same circles and relationships. I either ignore it, address it, avoid it or block it. I don't chase people down like a morality cop.

However, when there are things in a public setting, of which I am a part (whether online or otherwise) that are detrimental to those I love, or for whom I have responsibility, I do have a right to address those issues or actions, in a clear, wise, loving and uncompromising way.

PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY

If my family or parishioners do not want to be called to task for unbecoming attitudes, behavior and detrimental relationships, then they should keep those things to themselves, or better yet, live up to the grace that delivers them from such uncleanness. If a person does not want to be accountable for their wayward words, behavior or affiliations online, then they should not have me as a social media contact. I have had folks who did not invite me to parties, meetings and events, because they did not want me to be part of what they were doing. That is fine. Neither have I hunted anyone down or invaded their private or social environs.

However, for some reason people think they can say or do whatever they want online, without any accountability, and this is not true for healthy family and spiritual relationships.

BAD COMPANY CORRUPTS

The Bible says that bad company corrupts good morals. This is also true online. We all have "friends" (acquaintances) that hold to a different moral standard than we do and we get along with one another, because we don't expect each other to live by the same standards. Just as we must maintain relationships that are edifying for ourselves and children, and avoid relationships that are detrimental in the face to face world, we must do the same online. And remember, there are some lines of authority that do not change, even when online: that of the parent, the grandparent and the pastor.

BOTTOM LINE

I am going to love you and I am going to be consistent in my online presence just as I am in my face to face presence. If you allow me to be part of your online life, then expect me to be the same parent, grandparent and pastor that I am when we are face to face. If you feel torn in making a decision, then I would suggest you really count the cost and consider the prize. You can find stumbling blocks anywhere, but you can't always find a stepping stone.

(I realize this is a very simple note. I am not trying to get a Pulitzer, I just want to communicate a concern. Mostly this is for my natural and spiritual family. If this helps someone else, I am glad, if you don't like it, I don't really care, because it does not have anything to do with you anyway).